Have An Apple

I have a secret.
I am a thief. I take stuff and I don't give it back. I only do this sometimes, though. It does bother me occasionally when I stop to think about it. But I'm usually too busy to give it much thought, anyway.
For example, I did it last Tuesday. I went to Bible study and I sat there and I just took in what Kasey was teaching. I wrote copious notes, had some scales fall from my eyes in realization, jotted a blog idea or two off to the side based on what she was saying and even teared up at the end because I was so moved by her words. When it was time to go, I packed up the nuggets of information I would finish digesting later and then my mind was on how the pick up of the kids would go.
They would be hungry.
There would be a fit.
Would we go eat afterwards?
Did I have snacks in the car?
Did I bring that pacifier?
I passed Kasey in the parking lot within probably twenty feet. Probably examined my shoes as if they had grown some fascinating and exotic flowers spontaneously as I kept my head down and hurried to my children.
I take stuff every single Sunday at church. I sit in the service and soak in the worship music and glean lumps of wisdom from the pastor. And two weeks ago it was a guest speaker. He was so young and I was struck with his wisdom and poise. I remember at the end of the sermon, he was standing by himself and gathering his notes off the podium. I similarly gathered the notes I had taken from him .
And went the opposite way.
I read blogs and books that inspire me, give me ideas, motivate and encourage me. Like Catherine Zeta-Jones in Entrapment in that enviable scene where she acrobats her way through the red lasers to steal the goods, I am in and out and no one has noticed that someone else just read their blog and was moved by it.
That's how good I am.
But it's an uncomfortable, distended feeling.
I am growing fat, greedily gorging on others' words, music, lessons when I am not giving back.
Meanwhile, the people contributing to my spiritual diet are not Super Humans equipped with a gene that bypasses one of the basest desires that humans have: affirmation.
And that same gene does not provide them with a limitless supply of creativity, insight and encouragement.
They dig for that stuff.
And then they give it away.
That takes guts.
I take that for granted more than I should. I don't think I have ever told a pastor 'Hey. I was really moved by what you said. It made me reach out to my brother and that changed our relationship.'
I mean, that's kind of enormous. And it's only one little example. It happens all the time.
Let's make a pro/con list on encouragement:
Pros:
*It could lift someone's day when they think they aren't making a smidge of difference.
*They could turn that around and encourage someone else.
*They are being affirmed by God (you know how He does that crazy stuff) with something
*It's a Moment when we connect with another human being.
*It could give them some energy to start a new/another project
I'm going to quit being silly and listing the Pros...they are limitless and beyond our imaginations and I tend to think that when we are prompted to connect in that way it comes from God and, well, there is no telling what He is up to.
But we still have to deal with the drawbacks....
Cons:
It takes one minute out of your day.

There. That's it.
No more gorging for me.
I am going on a diet.

Out of curiosity, are you good at feeding back? Do you let someone know when they have touched you?

A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.
Proverbs 25:11

For Rachel, Laura and Kristi...your timely words of encouragement have been God's voice whispering directly in my ear. Thank you.

Soil Test

I love to shop. Whether I buy anything or not, one of my favorite things to do is to sip a cup of coffee and saunter (yes, saunter) around and check stuff out. Sometimes, I will get a buggy and put all the items that seriously interest me into it. At the end of the trip, I evaluate each item and either put it back or buy it.
'Do I need this?'
'Is this a good deal?'
'Can I safely hide this in my car until time to unveil it to my husband?'
On the whole, I'm a pretty discerning shopper.
Unfortunately, I find that critical attitude has leaked over into our looking for a church. We moved to town almost two years ago and are still Church Shopping. You know, the process of walking by a row of churches, holding them up, trying them on and then asking 'Does this one make me look fat?'
This is a new experience for us.
My husband and I have always been fortunate to find a church home in the three towns that we have lived in in the last twelve years. We just walked in, felt a gigantic mental hug, looked at each other and we just knew 'We're home.'
Just like a Lifetime movie, right?
Not so this time.
We have permananent name tags in at least three churches here.
We are on untold email lists and I honestly can't keep up with what church is having the social for what group on what night. I showed up with a green bean casserole to a fasting prayer group.
Not really, but I feel like it would be completely within the realm of possibility lately.
Even though I am ashamed to admit it,this next part really happened.
We went back to the very first church we visited when we moved here. We unwittingly visited a Sunday School class (I am old school and it will always be Sunday School) that we had visited before and both agreed was not 'our style'...never intending to go back.
Well our short-term memory loss and bipolar church attendance put us back full circle.
Currently, the class is dissecting the words of Jesus so it is one passage at a time with much discussion. Somewhere in the middle, there was a lot of rabbit-chasing going on, personal stories, digression, conjecture. There was also a woman sitting RIGHT NEXT TO ME that was chewing her gum more vigorously than I have ever seen any task accomplished. And that is the truth. Right down to the triple-bubble-pop-on-the-inside-of-the-mouth routine. I don't know what it is, but I feel God strategically places Gum Chewers throughout my life to work out what He has started in me. My husband sensed my mental white surrender flag. He literally put his hand on my leg, patted it and said 'Hang in there.'
That's how well I can hide my emotions.
Sunday School is over and we go to Big Church and we have this whole discussion which kind of but not really goes like this:
Me: I respect the fact that you like tradition, the choir to sing in robes and donuts served with coffee every Sunday, but....
Him: Okay. What do you have in mind?
Me: I don't know but I need something.
Him: They seem like nice people that are genuinely interested in each other with the prayer requests and discussion. Don't you think so? But I'm up for whatever. Find us a class and we will visit.
And so it went in this vein...with me basically giving the class two out of five stars.
I remember feeling on the verge of tears. I actually had to pick at an imaginary thread on my dress and blink rapidly or I was going to lose it in frustration. I was completely deflated.
I was looking off to the side, much like when I am mad in the car, and I remember this feeling that struck me...not unlike a lingering warmth after a slap in the face.
It's God's Holy Word.
It's God's Holy Word.
It's God's Holy Word.
It's God's Holy Word.
Those words echoed throughout my empty head.
The Word of God has power and authority.
Power.
And Authority.
Matthew 13 tells us the parable of the four soils.
Some seed fell along the path and the birds came and ate it up. Some fell on rocky places without much soil. Other seed fell among the thorns and was choked out. In other words, some seed was scattered because I wasn't greeted warmly at the door of the church. Some seed was snatched in annoyance because I was focused on the one man in the group who spoke up every time a question was asked. And some seed was snatched because I didn't get the preacher's opening joke.
Sounds shallow, doesn't it?
It is.
I sometimes am.
But I am eternally grateful for God's timely and graceful reminders when I have the good sense to open myself up to listen.

May we never leave unchanged from hearing God's Truth.

The Son is the radiance of God's glory and the exact representation of his being, sustaining all things by his powerful word. Hebrews 1:3